So, April is Cesarean Awareness Month. Do you say "happy" cesarean awareness month?
There's really nothing happy about my c-section. However, I absolutely want more people to be aware of it. If only doctors were aware of the HORRIBLE side effects of cesareans, they might (just might) be more cautious in making the first cut.
I believe everyone should be aware of cesareans and their impact. If only I would have known their impact before the cut. If only my husband would have known, he could have been prepared and better able to support me. If my mom would have known, she might have been more sympathetic in the early days.
I could go on with the "if onlys" for a long time, but I won't.
The important question is....are you aware?
The BEST resource for cesarean awareness is ICAN. They saved my life. Check them (us) out -- www.ican-online.com.
ICAN is about educating, preventing c-sections, and helping women (and their families) recover from c-sections.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Michelle Duggar Rocks!
I wanted to post this last week, but never got around to it. Tonight, as I am watching "18 and Counting" I couldn't wait any longer.
Michelle Duggar is an amazing woman! First, I do love watching the Duggars. Ironically, I'm really nothing like the Duggars. I'm not conservative at all. I don't wear skirts. I watch (way too much) TV. And on and on....
But, really, they are an amazing family. I've always admired the fact they are out of debt. For a family of any size, being out of debt is truly incredible. Michelle is always so calm, cool, and collected. I can't imagine. Sometimes I feel so frazzled with 1 child.
A while back, Jim Bob talked about about VBAC. Michelle has had 3 c-sections out of 14 deliveries (2 sets of twins, 1 was c-section). Jim Bob & Michelle both are advocates of VBAC. It's really amazing to have very respectable people who are huge advocates of something some people see as controversial (by the way, VBAC should not be controversial).
Then, last week and again tonight, Michelle is BREASTFEEDING on TV! She just straps on her "my brest friend" and a hooter hider (or something similar) and walks around breastfeeding. I love it!
What an amazing family. I get so irritated when people wonder why they have so many kids. First, it's none of your business. Second, they are out of debt. They can afford all of their children. Third, they, but probably most importantly, they take great care of their children. The children are being raised in an excellent home. They will be contributing members to society. So, if you have a problem with the Duggars -- take a look in the mirror.
Michelle Duggar is an amazing woman! First, I do love watching the Duggars. Ironically, I'm really nothing like the Duggars. I'm not conservative at all. I don't wear skirts. I watch (way too much) TV. And on and on....
But, really, they are an amazing family. I've always admired the fact they are out of debt. For a family of any size, being out of debt is truly incredible. Michelle is always so calm, cool, and collected. I can't imagine. Sometimes I feel so frazzled with 1 child.
A while back, Jim Bob talked about about VBAC. Michelle has had 3 c-sections out of 14 deliveries (2 sets of twins, 1 was c-section). Jim Bob & Michelle both are advocates of VBAC. It's really amazing to have very respectable people who are huge advocates of something some people see as controversial (by the way, VBAC should not be controversial).
Then, last week and again tonight, Michelle is BREASTFEEDING on TV! She just straps on her "my brest friend" and a hooter hider (or something similar) and walks around breastfeeding. I love it!
What an amazing family. I get so irritated when people wonder why they have so many kids. First, it's none of your business. Second, they are out of debt. They can afford all of their children. Third, they, but probably most importantly, they take great care of their children. The children are being raised in an excellent home. They will be contributing members to society. So, if you have a problem with the Duggars -- take a look in the mirror.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Toddler-Hood
I am so loving having a toddler! This past weekend we went to Sesame Street Live. To see little A sing and dance and smile at all the characters....it was so sweet! She LOVES to dance. The girl moved nearly the entire 1 1/2 hours! I was exhausted when we left.
These days, you can actually have a conversation with her...mostly about boogers and things like that, but it's still a conversation. The first day it happened, I was so in shock! You can ask questions. She answers. It's amazing!
Last week, we did buy a potty for her. We're not pressing anything. We just wanted to have it around. Tonight, when I came home from work, I went to the bathroom. She went with me & wanted to take off her jeans and diaper. She just sat there with me. But, you could tell she thought she was a big girl. Grandma Smith bought her some of the cutest red panties with ruffles on the bottom. We're really trying to make them sound special. They are so stinkin' cute!
Now, we've always let her watch You Tube on our phones. Some may think we're crazy, but we are! So, tonight she went to Jingle Bells on Cullens ABCs. First, let me back-up by saying Cullens ABCs is the absolute best thing on earth. Cullen is this pre-school director. She has posted TONS of videos on You Tube. Nursery rhymes, Christmas songs, stories...it's wonderful. See, when A was little (well, smaller than now), we really didn't know all the words to Itsy Bitsy Spider. Yes, it's true. I googled it and that's how I found Cullen's ABCs. Check it out -- www.cullensabcs.com. Back to the story. She was singing Jingle Bells -- dancing and singing, doing all the motions. It was so funny. So, when it was "night night" time, she could watch one more video. I said "find Jingle Bells". She did. She scrolled right to it (okay, the second time). It was amazing.
I love that little girl more than anything on earth! I think I have laughed every single day since she was born. Despite the tantrums, the crying, the fussiness, she's the best thing ever!
These days, you can actually have a conversation with her...mostly about boogers and things like that, but it's still a conversation. The first day it happened, I was so in shock! You can ask questions. She answers. It's amazing!
Last week, we did buy a potty for her. We're not pressing anything. We just wanted to have it around. Tonight, when I came home from work, I went to the bathroom. She went with me & wanted to take off her jeans and diaper. She just sat there with me. But, you could tell she thought she was a big girl. Grandma Smith bought her some of the cutest red panties with ruffles on the bottom. We're really trying to make them sound special. They are so stinkin' cute!
Now, we've always let her watch You Tube on our phones. Some may think we're crazy, but we are! So, tonight she went to Jingle Bells on Cullens ABCs. First, let me back-up by saying Cullens ABCs is the absolute best thing on earth. Cullen is this pre-school director. She has posted TONS of videos on You Tube. Nursery rhymes, Christmas songs, stories...it's wonderful. See, when A was little (well, smaller than now), we really didn't know all the words to Itsy Bitsy Spider. Yes, it's true. I googled it and that's how I found Cullen's ABCs. Check it out -- www.cullensabcs.com. Back to the story. She was singing Jingle Bells -- dancing and singing, doing all the motions. It was so funny. So, when it was "night night" time, she could watch one more video. I said "find Jingle Bells". She did. She scrolled right to it (okay, the second time). It was amazing.
I love that little girl more than anything on earth! I think I have laughed every single day since she was born. Despite the tantrums, the crying, the fussiness, she's the best thing ever!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
I heart ICAN!
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1880665,00.html
I found ICAN very shortly after my c-section with little A. I knew something just wasn't right when I came home. I was "one of those" moms who never even dreamed of getting cut open to have a baby. But, after a long induction due to pre-eclampsia, my daughter was delivered my cesarean section. I wanted nothing, as far as labor goes; yet I got it all -- cytotec, AROM (artifical rupture of membranes), magnesium, epidural, pitocin, then the knife. I know this may sound harsh to some people, and it is harsh. After almost 21 months, my abdomen is still numb and tingly. It's not fun. If it were not for ICAN, I would have suffered postpartum depression. I know I would have. I wanted to crawl in a hole and hibernate. When my dd was about 12 hours old I realized I had not really seen her. I unwrapped her. She cried. My dh & I fought. And fought. And fought. It's painful, not only physically, but emotionally, to have a c-section. Who cares that I have an intact perineum. I don't. I have scar in my heart and on my abdomen.
So, when I found ICAN, I was delighted. There were other people like me. There were women...and maybe even some men...who get it. So, when the opportunity to help came up, I did what I could (of course, I wish I could have done more). I'm proud to say I was part of this project. It makes me so happy to know I might have helped someone in doing this.
Everyday women are denied the right to birth their baby the way they want. Women are told how and when to give birth. It's unfair. It's unethical. You can do something. I did. You can be a part of the solution. I am.
Here's the ICAN website. The women here, the support, the resources....they changed my life....
www.ican-online.org
I found ICAN very shortly after my c-section with little A. I knew something just wasn't right when I came home. I was "one of those" moms who never even dreamed of getting cut open to have a baby. But, after a long induction due to pre-eclampsia, my daughter was delivered my cesarean section. I wanted nothing, as far as labor goes; yet I got it all -- cytotec, AROM (artifical rupture of membranes), magnesium, epidural, pitocin, then the knife. I know this may sound harsh to some people, and it is harsh. After almost 21 months, my abdomen is still numb and tingly. It's not fun. If it were not for ICAN, I would have suffered postpartum depression. I know I would have. I wanted to crawl in a hole and hibernate. When my dd was about 12 hours old I realized I had not really seen her. I unwrapped her. She cried. My dh & I fought. And fought. And fought. It's painful, not only physically, but emotionally, to have a c-section. Who cares that I have an intact perineum. I don't. I have scar in my heart and on my abdomen.
So, when I found ICAN, I was delighted. There were other people like me. There were women...and maybe even some men...who get it. So, when the opportunity to help came up, I did what I could (of course, I wish I could have done more). I'm proud to say I was part of this project. It makes me so happy to know I might have helped someone in doing this.
Everyday women are denied the right to birth their baby the way they want. Women are told how and when to give birth. It's unfair. It's unethical. You can do something. I did. You can be a part of the solution. I am.
Here's the ICAN website. The women here, the support, the resources....they changed my life....
www.ican-online.org
Monday, February 9, 2009
What am I doing?
I just want to say this -- I hate macs.
I know that apple is "all that" but I just can't work on them! Okay, maybe I'll get used to it...see I'm sitting here on my PC, with my laptop (mac) open, trying to get something done on the laptop. Hence, it's no successful, so I'm blogging on the PC.
What a waste of my time.....
I know that apple is "all that" but I just can't work on them! Okay, maybe I'll get used to it...see I'm sitting here on my PC, with my laptop (mac) open, trying to get something done on the laptop. Hence, it's no successful, so I'm blogging on the PC.
What a waste of my time.....
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Up and Down
All day...when I thought A was doing good, she'd crump...cry, cry, cry, whine, whine, whine. Then, she'd perk right up. I suppose this is the road to recovery.
Luckily, she realized Motrin doesn't taste so bad. This morning she even said "tank you" after taking the motrin. Then, I some how tricked her in to taking her lortab tonight. It was the first time she'd had it today. I think she'll feel a lot better in the morning!
Luckily, she realized Motrin doesn't taste so bad. This morning she even said "tank you" after taking the motrin. Then, I some how tricked her in to taking her lortab tonight. It was the first time she'd had it today. I think she'll feel a lot better in the morning!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Surgery
Little A had her tonsils and adenoids out yesterday. For most people, this is not a big deal. However, there were a couple of issues that made the decision to have this done extremely difficult for me.
First, even though I am a nurse, I don't totally trust the medical profession. Especially surgeons. Surgeons were educated and trained to operate. If you go to a surgeon for a problem, they fix it with surgery. So, when our doctor (the ENT) recommended a T&A, I had my doubts. I thought he just wanted to do surgery because he is a surgeon. I wouldn't commit right away. I wanted to know the opinion of A's doctor...a family medicine doctor, not a surgeon at all. He said go ahead. See, A has (hopefully had) moderate sleep apnea. While her spells of apnea were not big (although almost 1 an hour), her sleep efficiency sucked. It was 75%, it should have been greater than 90%. Her respiratory disturbance index was 9.5 and it should have been less than 1.
Second, her tonsils weren't big, according to the ENT. When I did decide to schedule the surgery, the nurse said that the notes said they weren't big. This only seemed to confirmed by concerns from above...surgeons operate. I did what any mother would do -- I prayed and prayed. I needed a sign or something. Not that God always gives signs. But He has given me knowledge (being a nurse and assessment skills). Plus, call it being a mom, or maybe God helped my gut feeling, but I had one. Even though all the evidence said "her tonsils aren't big" and my logic said "there could be something else" my gut was screaming "GET THEM OUT!".
A couple of weeks ago, I was napping with A. She usually sleeps in a shirt, but for some reason (hmmm, God?) she was only in a diaper. I got the sign I needed. She started having intercostal retractions. Retractions are when your abdominal and/or chest wall muscles have to work so hard to breathe, you see "dips" between the ribs (intercostal), under the ribs (subcostal), etc. (Okay, so I think all of those are right!). Anyway, retractions are a sign of respiratory distress.
The night before surgery was horrible. Little A had a sore back or something. She fell the night before, so I think it might have been sore. She hardly slept. I hardly slept. I thought this was a sign we should cancel. But, I didn't. And, I couldn't nurse my all-night nurser after 3:45 am. That was hard, but I only had to say no once. She does usually like to nurse right before I get up. It is really hard to say no to a cute little baby saying "milk, milk".
The morning of surgery was smooth. Once we got to the hospital (the one where I work, so she didn't suspect a thing), things went extremely smoothly. The first case cancelled, so we didn't have to wait at all. We were supposed to go at 8:45 and we were now scheduled for 8 am. Everyone from the anesthesiologist (Dr. Y, loved him!) to the ENT (Dr. D) to the nurses and the CRNA rocked.
I got to go to the OR with A. I wasn't planning, but decided I would go back. She went to sleep in my arms. It wasn't scary or anything. Mostly because, I was under the impression A would be on a ventilator (letting a machine breathe for her, which is necessary with enough anesthesia). Dr. Y said that he doesn't to that. He puts a tube in her mouth, but she's breathing...basically he creates an airway for her. Because of this, I totally relaxed.
Dr. D said he'd be done in 20 minutes. Not a second past 20 minutes, he was out talking to us. He said her tonsils were much larger than he originally thought. And, he said her adenoids were taking up 100% of her airway...or something like that. Whew! I know that sound terrible, but what a relief. We didn't do surgery for nothing.
We spent the day & night in the hospital. A was groggy most of the day. About 5pm, she stood up and started jumping in her bed! She was ready to go! The night was fair (better than the sleep study) but not great. However, she has fallen asleep already, but who knows how long that'll last. I'm not holding my breath. :)
I hear it takes about 2 weeks to notice any difference. I do know that A has had difficulty breathing during sleep for her entire life. She snored. She sweated at night. Tossed and turned. Fussed. Never slept through the night (less than 10 times in almost 20 months). I just hope that she heals well and she is able to breathe at night!
I'm glad we did it. But, more than anything, I'm glad to be home. Resting peacefully in our own space...without the germs of the hospital. Ugh! Grossness.
First, even though I am a nurse, I don't totally trust the medical profession. Especially surgeons. Surgeons were educated and trained to operate. If you go to a surgeon for a problem, they fix it with surgery. So, when our doctor (the ENT) recommended a T&A, I had my doubts. I thought he just wanted to do surgery because he is a surgeon. I wouldn't commit right away. I wanted to know the opinion of A's doctor...a family medicine doctor, not a surgeon at all. He said go ahead. See, A has (hopefully had) moderate sleep apnea. While her spells of apnea were not big (although almost 1 an hour), her sleep efficiency sucked. It was 75%, it should have been greater than 90%. Her respiratory disturbance index was 9.5 and it should have been less than 1.
Second, her tonsils weren't big, according to the ENT. When I did decide to schedule the surgery, the nurse said that the notes said they weren't big. This only seemed to confirmed by concerns from above...surgeons operate. I did what any mother would do -- I prayed and prayed. I needed a sign or something. Not that God always gives signs. But He has given me knowledge (being a nurse and assessment skills). Plus, call it being a mom, or maybe God helped my gut feeling, but I had one. Even though all the evidence said "her tonsils aren't big" and my logic said "there could be something else" my gut was screaming "GET THEM OUT!".
A couple of weeks ago, I was napping with A. She usually sleeps in a shirt, but for some reason (hmmm, God?) she was only in a diaper. I got the sign I needed. She started having intercostal retractions. Retractions are when your abdominal and/or chest wall muscles have to work so hard to breathe, you see "dips" between the ribs (intercostal), under the ribs (subcostal), etc. (Okay, so I think all of those are right!). Anyway, retractions are a sign of respiratory distress.
The night before surgery was horrible. Little A had a sore back or something. She fell the night before, so I think it might have been sore. She hardly slept. I hardly slept. I thought this was a sign we should cancel. But, I didn't. And, I couldn't nurse my all-night nurser after 3:45 am. That was hard, but I only had to say no once. She does usually like to nurse right before I get up. It is really hard to say no to a cute little baby saying "milk, milk".
The morning of surgery was smooth. Once we got to the hospital (the one where I work, so she didn't suspect a thing), things went extremely smoothly. The first case cancelled, so we didn't have to wait at all. We were supposed to go at 8:45 and we were now scheduled for 8 am. Everyone from the anesthesiologist (Dr. Y, loved him!) to the ENT (Dr. D) to the nurses and the CRNA rocked.
I got to go to the OR with A. I wasn't planning, but decided I would go back. She went to sleep in my arms. It wasn't scary or anything. Mostly because, I was under the impression A would be on a ventilator (letting a machine breathe for her, which is necessary with enough anesthesia). Dr. Y said that he doesn't to that. He puts a tube in her mouth, but she's breathing...basically he creates an airway for her. Because of this, I totally relaxed.
Dr. D said he'd be done in 20 minutes. Not a second past 20 minutes, he was out talking to us. He said her tonsils were much larger than he originally thought. And, he said her adenoids were taking up 100% of her airway...or something like that. Whew! I know that sound terrible, but what a relief. We didn't do surgery for nothing.
We spent the day & night in the hospital. A was groggy most of the day. About 5pm, she stood up and started jumping in her bed! She was ready to go! The night was fair (better than the sleep study) but not great. However, she has fallen asleep already, but who knows how long that'll last. I'm not holding my breath. :)
I hear it takes about 2 weeks to notice any difference. I do know that A has had difficulty breathing during sleep for her entire life. She snored. She sweated at night. Tossed and turned. Fussed. Never slept through the night (less than 10 times in almost 20 months). I just hope that she heals well and she is able to breathe at night!
I'm glad we did it. But, more than anything, I'm glad to be home. Resting peacefully in our own space...without the germs of the hospital. Ugh! Grossness.
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